OFFICE POLITICS
“Nothing can be as perfect
as what you see in your own heart,”
he, the daddy-boss
said regretfully
as he took the opportunity
to remove his knife
from my back,
shrugging his shoulders
and shuffling his feet
in that sweet, little boy fashion
(eyes crinkled at the corners).
as what you see in your own heart,”
he, the daddy-boss
said regretfully
as he took the opportunity
to remove his knife
from my back,
shrugging his shoulders
and shuffling his feet
in that sweet, little boy fashion
(eyes crinkled at the corners).
I smiled back, numb.
Grateful for the crumb.
We were in the eye of a hurricane
I had created.
I’d called upon the support of a father
and he was not, after all, that
though he’d been lapping up
the daughterly devotion
for so long
without question.
Grateful for the crumb.
We were in the eye of a hurricane
I had created.
I’d called upon the support of a father
and he was not, after all, that
though he’d been lapping up
the daughterly devotion
for so long
without question.
And the pimping mommy-women
had watched on archly,
basketing the benefits
of our association
but high-signing him
for my demise
(which with remarkable swiftness
he’d obliged)
as soon as I’d started
brokering for power.
had watched on archly,
basketing the benefits
of our association
but high-signing him
for my demise
(which with remarkable swiftness
he’d obliged)
as soon as I’d started
brokering for power.
----------------------------
ODE TO L.J.
Black, sleek
cat chic.
Loose-limbed she lies
having lazed all day,
receiving life like a queen,
God’s well-rested being.
A paradox of wildness and obligingness
that great cat essence
hangs from her petite frame.
I named her Lady Jane.
cat chic.
Loose-limbed she lies
having lazed all day,
receiving life like a queen,
God’s well-rested being.
A paradox of wildness and obligingness
that great cat essence
hangs from her petite frame.
I named her Lady Jane.
Forget nine lives, what impresses me?
Her myriad of personalities.
Each day I must begin anew
her ever-elusive trust to woo.
There’s Jane, the sphinx, inscrutable
whose upright head while sleeping seems unmoveable.
Then on the edge of my highest chair
the terrain-scoping eyes of a vulture. Beware!
At sweet light’s out, my pillow-sharing teddy bear
(have you ever dreamed a motorboat was parting your hair?)
Her myriad of personalities.
Each day I must begin anew
her ever-elusive trust to woo.
There’s Jane, the sphinx, inscrutable
whose upright head while sleeping seems unmoveable.
Then on the edge of my highest chair
the terrain-scoping eyes of a vulture. Beware!
At sweet light’s out, my pillow-sharing teddy bear
(have you ever dreamed a motorboat was parting your hair?)
And just when you’ve marked her as lazy
she commences cleaning herself like crazy,
pausing suddenly amidst some balletic extension
for a moment’s reconnaissance in every direction.
No matter how many times she’s been bathed by me
the ritual generates into World War III.
The neighbors think an ax-wielding crazy
is bludgeoning the life from an innocent baby.
She manages to sustain the heart-rending howl
until she escapes my treacherous towel.
Yet soon, thereafter, how pleased she seems
with her soft and shiny (non-itch) sheen.
she commences cleaning herself like crazy,
pausing suddenly amidst some balletic extension
for a moment’s reconnaissance in every direction.
No matter how many times she’s been bathed by me
the ritual generates into World War III.
The neighbors think an ax-wielding crazy
is bludgeoning the life from an innocent baby.
She manages to sustain the heart-rending howl
until she escapes my treacherous towel.
Yet soon, thereafter, how pleased she seems
with her soft and shiny (non-itch) sheen.
Every so often, she’ll hide for hours at a time.
The futility of searching drives me out of my mind.
That black liquid body most anywhere she’ll squish
surfacing only at the whoosh of can-opener on tunafish.
Another enticement is when I am prone
on the carpet entranced by a meditation tape’s drone.
From nowhere she’ll bounce onto my abdomen
and ride out my constriction, the little demon!
When dinner’s past due, she offers some near intelligible chiding;
as I hasten to fix it, she’s against my calves gliding.
The futility of searching drives me out of my mind.
That black liquid body most anywhere she’ll squish
surfacing only at the whoosh of can-opener on tunafish.
Another enticement is when I am prone
on the carpet entranced by a meditation tape’s drone.
From nowhere she’ll bounce onto my abdomen
and ride out my constriction, the little demon!
When dinner’s past due, she offers some near intelligible chiding;
as I hasten to fix it, she’s against my calves gliding.
Reading or writing, I peer over a black landscape of body.
Sometimes she’ll manage to block the view entirely.
I remove her with a struggle (tooth and nail).
I win the battle, but her persistence prevails.
Not long after, she’s rematerialized, cozier than ever.
How can you not yield to a critter this clever?
As for unconditional loving, she’s the absolute first
having endured me sad, sloppy, angry . . . at my lethargic worst.
She’s kept all the secrets, my precious, mute friend.
Such a small vital presence; such a mighty godsend!
Sometimes she’ll manage to block the view entirely.
I remove her with a struggle (tooth and nail).
I win the battle, but her persistence prevails.
Not long after, she’s rematerialized, cozier than ever.
How can you not yield to a critter this clever?
As for unconditional loving, she’s the absolute first
having endured me sad, sloppy, angry . . . at my lethargic worst.
She’s kept all the secrets, my precious, mute friend.
Such a small vital presence; such a mighty godsend!
--------------------------------
AT THE CHINESE RESTAURANT
There’s a soap-opera gorgeous couple
surveying me with bored, disdainful eyes
at the next jammed close table – so unruffled –
I wish to God their food would soon arrive.
surveying me with bored, disdainful eyes
at the next jammed close table – so unruffled –
I wish to God their food would soon arrive.
The man in the reindeer-wholesome sweater,
bald head, bushy brows, a voice too hearty,
expounds on to his hostage listeners
the fate of the Democratic party.
bald head, bushy brows, a voice too hearty,
expounds on to his hostage listeners
the fate of the Democratic party.
As for the gossip-mongering duo
digging into food and friends greedily,
I’m blessedly spared their skewering focus
(for some time they won’t be ready for me).
digging into food and friends greedily,
I’m blessedly spared their skewering focus
(for some time they won’t be ready for me).
It’s the food alone in this over-crowded nest
that will soothe my savage, hunger-bitchy breast.
that will soothe my savage, hunger-bitchy breast.
---------------------------
CHANGE
Change isn’t easy.
Change makes me queasy.
It takes tremendous gall
to break through the wall
(installed by God, I guess).
Oh, what a mess
I make on one side trying
with frustration dying,
not quite empowered,
feeling the coward.
Discovering an intellectual grip
isn’t worth shit
without a rallied will sustainable,
convictions firm and unrestrainable.
Change makes me queasy.
It takes tremendous gall
to break through the wall
(installed by God, I guess).
Oh, what a mess
I make on one side trying
with frustration dying,
not quite empowered,
feeling the coward.
Discovering an intellectual grip
isn’t worth shit
without a rallied will sustainable,
convictions firm and unrestrainable.
Most people die,
their glory inside.
Half-knowing what’s required,
feeling so bloody tired,
like a gerbil on a wheel.
C’mon God, the deal?
I, as child, learned the pain
to distrust life’s game.
Derailed by family stress
(at one point clinically depressed)
I surrendered my hoping
for bottom-line coping.
While some caught the tide
I’d tread instead of ride.
their glory inside.
Half-knowing what’s required,
feeling so bloody tired,
like a gerbil on a wheel.
C’mon God, the deal?
I, as child, learned the pain
to distrust life’s game.
Derailed by family stress
(at one point clinically depressed)
I surrendered my hoping
for bottom-line coping.
While some caught the tide
I’d tread instead of ride.
Getting older
change seems slower
while adolescent wars still rage
in a middle-aged body cage.
Wanting a prime that’s higher
but serious courage required.
Oh, for the energy of my frenzied 20s
without confusion as my enemy!
I have serious wisdom gleaned
untangling the thread of the family skein.
A buoyancy of spirit I aim to harvest
and a satisfying niche, to carve it.
From indenture status to life’s favored guest
if I can recognize the POSITIVE in stress.
change seems slower
while adolescent wars still rage
in a middle-aged body cage.
Wanting a prime that’s higher
but serious courage required.
Oh, for the energy of my frenzied 20s
without confusion as my enemy!
I have serious wisdom gleaned
untangling the thread of the family skein.
A buoyancy of spirit I aim to harvest
and a satisfying niche, to carve it.
From indenture status to life’s favored guest
if I can recognize the POSITIVE in stress.
---------------------
"Most people die,
their glory inside."
That is so true, and so sad, Libby.
"Have you ever dreamed a motorboat was parting your hair?" --That sounds like my cat Karl. He spends the evening on my head, steals my pillow, and kneads my scalp. We call him a hair "artiste"!
Your poems are always moving. Would like to see a book of them!
xo
their glory inside."
That is so true, and so sad, Libby.
"Have you ever dreamed a motorboat was parting your hair?" --That sounds like my cat Karl. He spends the evening on my head, steals my pillow, and kneads my scalp. We call him a hair "artiste"!
Your poems are always moving. Would like to see a book of them!
xo
Love your cat!!
julie! thanks so much!
erica, thanks for your support with the poetry. nice to take it out of the dark files and share it here! you are really kind and that is so appreciated!
thanks, jmac. this dear cat passed on long ago. i wrote the ode to her when she did. I have had two sibling cats simultaneously since and the beginning of this year one of them died. I still have one who is a great comfort.
best, libby
erica, thanks for your support with the poetry. nice to take it out of the dark files and share it here! you are really kind and that is so appreciated!
thanks, jmac. this dear cat passed on long ago. i wrote the ode to her when she did. I have had two sibling cats simultaneously since and the beginning of this year one of them died. I still have one who is a great comfort.
best, libby
Wonderful, Libby! "A buoyancy of spirit I aim to harvest
and a satisfying niche, to carve it."
and a satisfying niche, to carve it."
Your poetry carries me along like a raft thru whitewater rapids. Exciting, invigorating, memorable.
Nominated for an OS Readers' Pick award. Needs a second. Please click on the highlighted words to open the RP page.
Libby, you are so talented, and your thinkings, always make me think and feel, and this is so great. Thank you for this..and your words say so much...
"..It takes tremendous gall
to break through the wall.."
Best wishes.!!
"..It takes tremendous gall
to break through the wall.."
Best wishes.!!
Thank you Libby, for adding me as a favorite. I was enlightened and impressed by your analysis of the Syrian situation. And today, I think your lines, "I surrendered my hoping for bottom-line coping." is actually the perfect operational definition for clinical depression. Boy, have I been there. Also have been in the same office politics syndrome as the first poem, with the exception that the women involved were all in the same situation as I was, and either kept quiet for their own survival or used him as he wanted to use them and took what they could get career-wise before escaping with references and other prizes. This all happened, of course, because I was in those hideously confusing twenties. Thanks for the insight! - Renee
This post has won a Readers' Picks Award.
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