A weekend away
invited to play
in the "altering" state
of Las Vegas, Nevada.
A birthday with brothers
and several others
to be treated like a queen
in the City of Dreams.
invited to play
in the "altering" state
of Las Vegas, Nevada.
A birthday with brothers
and several others
to be treated like a queen
in the City of Dreams.
My room quite a statement
of decadence most blatant --
columns and chiffon did surround
a bed that was round
with the requisite mirror above.
I, sans partner for love,
overcame this particular rub
and found comfort in the Jacuzzi tub.
of decadence most blatant --
columns and chiffon did surround
a bed that was round
with the requisite mirror above.
I, sans partner for love,
overcame this particular rub
and found comfort in the Jacuzzi tub.
Hundreds, no thousands, in the maze of casino betting.
I, self-conscious in any social setting,
had no reason to be
since NO ONE was looking at me
or for that matter anyone else --
fellowship was firmly on the shelf --
minds locked onto wheels, dice, cards and one-armed slots --
a convergence of parallel-playing tots!
I, self-conscious in any social setting,
had no reason to be
since NO ONE was looking at me
or for that matter anyone else --
fellowship was firmly on the shelf --
minds locked onto wheels, dice, cards and one-armed slots --
a convergence of parallel-playing tots!
I, soon magnetized like a good metal filing,
a 25-cent slot machine began filling.
My sole reason to live to keep its eyes spinning
until it surrenders a configuration of winning.
God, Fate or the Devil likes its winners beginners,
first lap on the road to philosophical sinners.
The red digits climbed as I sat there and shivered.
I maxed 1000 coins -- the tit had delivered!!!!
a 25-cent slot machine began filling.
My sole reason to live to keep its eyes spinning
until it surrenders a configuration of winning.
God, Fate or the Devil likes its winners beginners,
first lap on the road to philosophical sinners.
The red digits climbed as I sat there and shivered.
I maxed 1000 coins -- the tit had delivered!!!!
You'd think the thrill and mastery
would make a satisfied customer of me.
But no, I'd tasted jackpot city
so I played hard, then harder, until I felt shitty.
Las Vegas, no mere orgy of smokes, food and drinking,
is a deep, dark forest of distorted thinking.
Scheming, dreaming to mow down odds, even over and over,
defying random chance, now is that truly sober?
would make a satisfied customer of me.
But no, I'd tasted jackpot city
so I played hard, then harder, until I felt shitty.
Las Vegas, no mere orgy of smokes, food and drinking,
is a deep, dark forest of distorted thinking.
Scheming, dreaming to mow down odds, even over and over,
defying random chance, now is that truly sober?
With half my loot left I surfaced for air
wanting to relate to my relatives there.
But alas, they were on their own game-playing rides
and minds set for intimacy did not coincide.
wanting to relate to my relatives there.
But alas, they were on their own game-playing rides
and minds set for intimacy did not coincide.
At the too-crowded airport I pondered the lessons of victory and lapse
when a ticket dispatcher offered me 400 bucks to postpone my flight -- PERHAPS!
Geez, what is it with this town?
They play with your nerve endings until you leave the ground.
when a ticket dispatcher offered me 400 bucks to postpone my flight -- PERHAPS!
Geez, what is it with this town?
They play with your nerve endings until you leave the ground.
Rated.
Happy Birthday, libbyliberal and the poem was GREAT! It's hard to picture you in Vegas for your birthday but what a great idea for your family to take you there! And a WINNER, too - you can't beat that! Yes, LV is smoke and mirrors for sure but it sounds like you had fun and I'm glad for that. Not quite Central Park, but definitely a break...next time, consider a trip to Texas...we'd love to have you visit! P.S. My birthday is this month on the 21st. 12 -21...lucky numbers!
Do you get home or write this on your phone? This was great and you got it all in there. :D
I am sorry to hear you had nobody to enjoy the overhead mirror with.
That's why it's there... if you really want a rush, play poker. Happy B'day.
Glad you won. Glad you had sense enough to leave with some of your winnings.
Hope you had a great birfdae....!!
;-)
.
Hope you had a great birfdae....!!
;-)
.
The tit giveth and the tit taketh away. Here's something to read before your next casino gambol: The Man Who Broke Atlantic City
Happy B'Day, too, of course!
Brava! And rhyming too!
Awwww. Appreciate the birthday wishes, but I feel like a pretender now. I came across this poem yesterday and decided to post it but it was written a serious while ago. Though, this year my Feb. birthday was not a highly celebrated one, so I am going to let the well-wishing above from you all warm me ... belatedly but selfishly! I thank you. HOW SWEET IT IS!!! xxxx
Thanks, Bleue, for the rating. I am such a political blogger that posting a poem or something personal is risky for me, leaving the identity "role" I have established at os.
Sheila, thanks for your feedback. The Vegas birthday celebration and family reunion was kind of a hoot. In spite of being a New Yorker I had and still have never been to nearby Atlantic City, so the trip to Las Vegas was my first time with the big-time gambling experience. It was a delicious and at the same time troubling roller coaster ... the high of the win, watching myself get willfully compulsive about getting MORE. Enjoying family togetherness and yet hungry for more focused intimacy as they went into their gambling trances as well, the luxurious accommodations paid for by others. It was a hoot and a novel and enlightening experience. SHEILA, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONTH TO YOU!!! I hope it is a good one! Thanks for the invite to Texas! Never been there, either! Good luck with lucky numbers!!! :)
tg within, I am so glad this poem resonated for you. Hah! I wrote this poem immediately after on the plane on the way back to NYC. I had this dismayed feeling about the weekend like, "What just happened?" An adventure for the spirit and the senses. At the airport they did offer me $400 to take a later flight and as I walked away with another high of how to spend that unexpected money, twenty minutes later the agent came over to me and said, "Good news, we have room for you after all." Sigh. No $400.
Jack, hah, again! Thanks for the empathy. It was Caesar's palace, and such an elaborate room of faux-Roman decadence with the round bed, mirror overhead, columns and chiffon ... made me smile but at the same time really underlined my singleness as I said. Sigh. Not the total package of the sexy LV experience, but it was still a pleasurable hoot.
jmac, yes, years later having visited LV a couple more times I do prefer the poker machines (I am too self-conscious for blackjack tables) but am still unsettled by that "compulsiveness" that is such a slippery slope, especially considering my chronic financial stress. But rush is the word as the numbers go up and then down. Poker requires more skill than the slots but one is still gratuitously flirting with that flying fickle finger of fate! And as the years pass, I swear, like with instant lottery tickets, they are pulling back at one's chances. Grrrrrrrrrr.
sky, thanks!!!! Thanks for congratulating me on walking away with half of my winnings left. I suppose that was a victory considering that trance state. I was dismayed that since I had won once I could win more easily again and I did want that rush again that was so unexpected. Amazing that frying pan on the head trance one goes into, especially with the taste of a first win. I didn't think it would hook me and it did. Assuming I had more control than I do. Surprise, again, libby!
Matt, thanks for the reference. Will check out. I remember a great Rod Serling story years ago about a guy haunted by a slot machine, calling to him. I think his name was Franklin. The Twilight Zone. I felt like I had put my big toe in a twilight zone with that visit. It was fun but alarming. Remember the movie Lost in America where Albert Brooks's wife in the middle of the night loses their nest egg and Albert tries to coax casino owner Garry Marshall to return it? Talk about an exercise in futility but Albert pits his wits desperately against Garry Marshall. Kinda like us asking the 1% to share their wealth they took from us. Same odds of getting it back, too. Nada.
toritto/F, yes, the ding ding ding ... and the lights flashing -- that was a frying pan on the head jolting rush of pleasure and sweet shock, though at the same time I was embarrassed at all the noise when I realized it was coming from my machine and all those people lost in their own trances came out of them to look over at lucky me! As the numbers climbed I couldn't remember if I had doubled my winnings or how far up it was going. It was a high number but of course it was in quarters not dollars so that was part of the roller coaster, too, of thinking I had won bigger than I had, but nevertheless. And i was so naive and caught up in it I neglected to tip the casino worker who came over to hand over the cash for that win. One of my brothers from across the room caught my big smile and was thrilled for me, since the birthday trip was a collective gift from them. Sounds of casino in the morning, you say ...ulp ... yes, that what time of the day is it, anyway? Casino timelessness. Lost in space for sure.
best, libby :)
Thanks, Bleue, for the rating. I am such a political blogger that posting a poem or something personal is risky for me, leaving the identity "role" I have established at os.
Sheila, thanks for your feedback. The Vegas birthday celebration and family reunion was kind of a hoot. In spite of being a New Yorker I had and still have never been to nearby Atlantic City, so the trip to Las Vegas was my first time with the big-time gambling experience. It was a delicious and at the same time troubling roller coaster ... the high of the win, watching myself get willfully compulsive about getting MORE. Enjoying family togetherness and yet hungry for more focused intimacy as they went into their gambling trances as well, the luxurious accommodations paid for by others. It was a hoot and a novel and enlightening experience. SHEILA, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONTH TO YOU!!! I hope it is a good one! Thanks for the invite to Texas! Never been there, either! Good luck with lucky numbers!!! :)
tg within, I am so glad this poem resonated for you. Hah! I wrote this poem immediately after on the plane on the way back to NYC. I had this dismayed feeling about the weekend like, "What just happened?" An adventure for the spirit and the senses. At the airport they did offer me $400 to take a later flight and as I walked away with another high of how to spend that unexpected money, twenty minutes later the agent came over to me and said, "Good news, we have room for you after all." Sigh. No $400.
Jack, hah, again! Thanks for the empathy. It was Caesar's palace, and such an elaborate room of faux-Roman decadence with the round bed, mirror overhead, columns and chiffon ... made me smile but at the same time really underlined my singleness as I said. Sigh. Not the total package of the sexy LV experience, but it was still a pleasurable hoot.
jmac, yes, years later having visited LV a couple more times I do prefer the poker machines (I am too self-conscious for blackjack tables) but am still unsettled by that "compulsiveness" that is such a slippery slope, especially considering my chronic financial stress. But rush is the word as the numbers go up and then down. Poker requires more skill than the slots but one is still gratuitously flirting with that flying fickle finger of fate! And as the years pass, I swear, like with instant lottery tickets, they are pulling back at one's chances. Grrrrrrrrrr.
sky, thanks!!!! Thanks for congratulating me on walking away with half of my winnings left. I suppose that was a victory considering that trance state. I was dismayed that since I had won once I could win more easily again and I did want that rush again that was so unexpected. Amazing that frying pan on the head trance one goes into, especially with the taste of a first win. I didn't think it would hook me and it did. Assuming I had more control than I do. Surprise, again, libby!
Matt, thanks for the reference. Will check out. I remember a great Rod Serling story years ago about a guy haunted by a slot machine, calling to him. I think his name was Franklin. The Twilight Zone. I felt like I had put my big toe in a twilight zone with that visit. It was fun but alarming. Remember the movie Lost in America where Albert Brooks's wife in the middle of the night loses their nest egg and Albert tries to coax casino owner Garry Marshall to return it? Talk about an exercise in futility but Albert pits his wits desperately against Garry Marshall. Kinda like us asking the 1% to share their wealth they took from us. Same odds of getting it back, too. Nada.
toritto/F, yes, the ding ding ding ... and the lights flashing -- that was a frying pan on the head jolting rush of pleasure and sweet shock, though at the same time I was embarrassed at all the noise when I realized it was coming from my machine and all those people lost in their own trances came out of them to look over at lucky me! As the numbers climbed I couldn't remember if I had doubled my winnings or how far up it was going. It was a high number but of course it was in quarters not dollars so that was part of the roller coaster, too, of thinking I had won bigger than I had, but nevertheless. And i was so naive and caught up in it I neglected to tip the casino worker who came over to hand over the cash for that win. One of my brothers from across the room caught my big smile and was thrilled for me, since the birthday trip was a collective gift from them. Sounds of casino in the morning, you say ...ulp ... yes, that what time of the day is it, anyway? Casino timelessness. Lost in space for sure.
best, libby :)
Thanks, Erica! You slipped in there while I was commenting! :)
I remember that Twilight Zone episode. The clanking coins coming out would call his name: FRAAAAAAAANKLIN! Every where he'd go, even in bed in the hotel he'd hear the machine calling him: FRAAAAAAAAANKLIN! FRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANKLIN! I can even see the actor, but can't think of his name. One of the guys Serling always used to play the schmeil.
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